Celebrating the life called Maragatham — Part 1

She feels uneasy, more than usual. The pain in her feet and legs has been a constant companion for a while now, but this time she just knows that something is horribly wrong. Going against her sense of control, she calls out to her long-standing friend — Kanamma in the next door, and they rush her to the hospital.

The doctors do an ECG and an all-body check-up. But she knows what’s really going wrong. The body that had so far given in to her determination and spirit, was now pleading for rest. Some more time, she wills herself. I won't leave like this — I have to see my family. She decides to go to Bangalore where she would be with 5 out of her 8 siblings — including Bhooma who would readily come from Chennai to meet her.

She stood out, now and back then

She was born in 1938, at her periya athai’s (eldest aunt’s) house, in Chennai. But moving ahead Srirangam would be her fort and uplifting her family, the mission of her life. She was named Maragatham, whoever thought of that name probably could see her future then. She would shine all her life. She would stand out. She would bring prosperity to so many lives. Like every cut of the emerald, her experiences in life would only make her stronger and more elegant. But most literally, she would just love gold! Adorned in the most exquisite gold jewelry and a silk saree of a rare shade, she would look regal. As one of her paatasalai students once told his wife “You have only seen actresses on screen, you should see our amma standing royally at the gate of her house. It would be a sight to behold and cherish. Not just once in a while but each and every day!”

She was very close to all her siblings. Rajam, Padma, and Babu — she kept tabs on their well being. She would always look for means to spend time with all of them. Her fights with her elder brother, Babu, for the yummy potato roasts that she would keep aside only to have them gobbled by her brother, have probably been told to each and every kid in the family.

“She was ahead of her time in understanding the value of education.” Her sister Malathi says “She would take her studies and exams very seriously. No one would push her to do so. I would skip school and play gilli danda with the boys. But she had ambitions, she wanted to become an IAS officer. After she finished her 10th class, our family wanted to get her married to our aunt’s son. She opposed getting married saying she wanted to pursue her dreams. But a mami in the neighborhood convinced her to get married to help the family. I dont know what she told her but my sister lived up to her promise to help everyone in the family at all stages. I owe my life to her”

“She was my guardian angel sent from heaven,” says the brother, Sampath, younger to Maragatham by two years. When asked to talk about fond and early memories of his sister, he said “All I need to do is to talk about my life span till now as she has been a constant companion and an integral part of it. She was older than me with a small age gap. We shared a special bond and yet she was also a mother. It was as though she was God-sent to take care of me and provide timely help. She would go the extra mile to groom me and ensure I remained on track.”

“All of us knew her as a tough and bold lady. But she had an affectionate side to her which elevated her personality. The welfare of the family was paramount to her. She would ponder about all our lives and would take great efforts to help us during challenging times by providing emotional and financial support.”

“Coming back to my journey with her, it started in the early days of my education. She was keen that I excel in my academics. I am a self-driven personality myself and having her encouragement only helped my case further. Thinking back now, I find it hard to describe her role in those years of my life — she probably never verbally laid it out but her intentions that I had a sound foundation in education was very resolute.”

“For my marriage, I have to give her credit for choosing the right partner and family for me. She was pushing for Kamala’s alliance. I remember Kanna, that is Kesavan, would take the cycle every other day before my marriage and visit my in-law's house to make sure everything was alright.”

“When Kamala was pregnant with Nirupama, again she was there to support. Those days carts were our mode of transport. However, Kesavan and she had a car. When it was time for Niru’s birth, she told the driver to stay and ensure comfort for the mother & child. Kamala’s parents being in Srirangam, ensured that her bond with my daughters grew stronger. I remember a time when Kamala and Niru visited her when I think Niru was 3 years old. She was so affectionate towards them, she made elaborate preparations and also took photos which were a rare affair in those days. I still have those photos.”

“Life then kept me busy, I was keen on growing my business. There were financial needs now and then, but I did not want to seek any kind of help there. I once told her that you sell off some gold that I gave her so that it provided for my need at that time. She didn’t tell me then, but she gave back those silver and gold artifacts later during Niru’s engagement. She played a prominent role during both Niru and Nived’s wedding.”

“After my retirement, I moved to Bangalore. But I wanted a house in Srirangam, the town holds a special place in mine and Kamala’s hearts. She was trying to sell one of the houses her family-owned, but because of issues beyond her control, there were delays. At one point, I almost gave up my dream of a home in Srirangam. But again, she put her foot down and made it happen for me.”

“Her affection and care can be seen in the details she pays attention to. During our visits to Srirangam, everything would be taken care of. She would see to it that Coffee decoction would be ready when we reached there early morning, our house would have been cleaned up the previous day by her maid and we had the required ration for the duration of our visit.”

“We always fought a lot.” says Rangarajan, “I remember the first time she scolded me. I got some elai vadam and she was furious that I had bought something from outside. I felt very bad initially, but then we moved on. There used to be a constant cat and mouse game between us.”

She would disagree with her brother’s choice of movies, and once she asked him with exasperation ‘How do you tolerate so much violence in these movies’ and he only looked at her and said ‘the same way you tolerate so much drama in all the serials that you see’. The arguments ranged from banter about everyday things to serious debates about political issues. Being a closely-knit family, they would be together often when someone in the family would be admitted to the hospital. They would then argue about whether a treatment given was right or not. But beyond all this, there was deep-rooted affection and respect. He was always there to accompany her for her trips to Chennai and Bangalore, after her husband, Kesavan passed away. He would be her silent rock support.

She was a mother to her youngest sister, Bhooma, who says the impact on her life is too significant to put into words. Her husband, VRR says “Maragatham was the monarch of whatever she surveyed. Bold and authoritative, frugal, and self-sustaining. She would always demand things happen the way she does it out as she believed that is the best way. The astounding manner in which she would deal with her income tax filing as if her life depended on it was a sample of her sincerity and dedication to what she believes right. Amazing the way she lived the all alone life with courage, simplicity, and with a never give up attitude. For a town that believes in gossip as much as their breath she was an absolute exception never talking one word that will involve others without purpose. She would always expect everybody should be as much sincere and committed. Whatever happened her last days with Kala-Sridharan was an apt climax to the everlasting excellence in relations between the three. She will observe all of us about whom she is concerned and never shy away from saying what is good and what needs to be improved instantly. She had an eye for details. She loved her Bajjis and Bondas always. Unique royal personality.”

“MK from my lifeline….” writes her youngest sibling, Chingan

“Sri Lakshmi Narasimgha Parabrahmanae Namaha

MK:

There are many reason for PattuSri family that Srirangam is highly important…need less to say …

1. Lord Ranganatha~Ranganayaki…

2. Singaperumal Koil- SPK

3. Samayapuram Mari Amman…

Besides this you have Chakkrath azzwar, Cauvery, Malaikottai Pillyar…the boomi devi… She has bestowed our welfare…

Our life destiny of every action and progress is based on the above process….

Before opening up I would like to list the life secret of PattuSri family is these blessings are with them as “Paddu Kappu” (PKV) valayam … the valayam keeps helping them whether they are able to recognise in their daily activities or even through some challenges they might have faced, common in today’s life style.

This PKV is their birth right blessed by the Almighty 🌸🙏🏼God please ignore our ignorances and after all, we are your children 🙏🏼🌸 I’m one of the member’s who realizes the same everywhere in my system…days will not move if the recognition is not realized… through this, I could see millions of sub” Padu Kappu Valayam” around me…. it may be surprising… Let me see how I’m able to bring about the stand…

MK’s Legendary life:

Born as a fourth member of the family… she is certainly a precious flower to the PattuSri family… it is pretty difficult to establish these facts, as you can really see me as a very normal human being who does not have the “insight- knowledge-brilliance-super energy” to gain such clarity… however, I will try...

My lines on familiarising with MK as a brother had started somewhere when I was 3 years and she got married in Thoppu Bangalow… incidentally, I was also born in the same place… quite near to Singa Perumal Koil … I carry a birth name as Singan…

This marriage event is circling around me vaguely even today … I never had had great interaction with MK till the age of 9 years … probably at this age only I might have got the recognition of who is my brother and sister, what they mean to me… here Rangan-Malathi- Bhooma are exceptions.

Well, coming back to Post marriage when I was around 6 years, I visited North Chitra street, where I met Rangan MK neighbour… this guy is my first “ Mittru Devo bhava” even today… but my interaction always with him is thin … since the respect is high for the category… he is part of another PKV for me …well he told me this is where your Sister lives… unaware of what to do after the cricket session, I moved back to home near SPK.

To cut the long story let me place the lines of who is MK and what is her life lines and why she is important… this is based on my close association from 9 years to the date she passed away… certainly, she passed away from all of us …in me she lives in every part of my system and Soul… thus she is one more “ PKV” hence day does noes not start if the realization process does not complete through…

Now the real MK( action starts):

To PattuSri family:

Even though she is fourth in the family in many happenings she ascended her spot to 1 … after Pattammal passed away …all of us resorted to the acceptance without any debate or discussion… it is not the financial interest but the acumen and the right maturity…

She is a product of Srirangam women high school.. I’m sure she would not have been a brilliant student as this is a disqualification for the first generation of PattuSri family… Sampath is an exception …our strength does not come from the academy education but from life’s practical education… this is a superpower I consider. The great lady Pattamal is known for splendid management practices inside the home, even though she hardly crossed 5th Standard.

Mk inside PatttuSri family is highly interactive handles situation based on the event.. she enjoys good food, dressing, affectionate, at times differs, aggressive, and reaches back fast. Her visits are neither close nor distanced ones. We get the best of Srirangam…. Ellai vadaam …just the best… besides Temple selected special prasadams….here and there gold ornaments, sarees…initially for a very long time I used to get my dresses through her only…..to be frank my first Jeans and Sony transistor were from her after their Singapore trip….she alway keeps all members excited…. This shows how close we were in hearts….equal was Mr.Kesavan …..amazing sweet gentlemen …their stay used to be reasonably stable and highly enjoyable.

MK in her husband’s place…..

She certainly was very popular with all ages..all the members use to call her babbi…she was very close to all the members from Saroja akka to Sridhar… She had a fabulous relation with Atthai and Attimber ( Mr Kesavan parents)…. Closeness was always energetic…..this helped us to become close to the next generation and we are all well connected… Mr.Kesavan Sisters- Brother’s and spouse we were always closely related and equals..

Well great to see MK was a solid allrounder inside both the families…she certainly was a life line…😇.

Will start looking at some of her strong facets….

Communication: she was very strong in both written and oral….. her in-land letters were superb… Nice modulation… She can bring the situation or world in front of one… So is oral communication… She will change the delivery based on the need… She can manage emotions very well… She can bring in emotion nicely in her communication when it is required… Very few can meet this….

Her neighbours: pretty close… It will look as if she has born with them… Her respects, response and care are amazing…genuine…she commands a high respect from the very close….

Trichy society… Both in Srirangam and Trichy specially the Rotary- Lions group…. She was well known with some speciality doctors… Overall very popular for her background.

Leadership…. Pretty strong… She can take the whole team in her wings… Without challenges… Well thought actions for each situation…befitting the need…never impatient…at one time she handled the Paatashala team effectively and assertively….

Home maker… Very successful… Well thought actions….broad views…. understand what can help and do the best depending on people….the vadaam mamma case is the back up of charity suport… She was silently extending…her support and relation with Mr.Kesavan was amazing and enjoyable…her financial dealing and accounting has years of back up….she effectively closed the personal finances nicely without any ambiguity..well thought one…..

As the time keeps rolling we miss out the best of people when they are alive..,we do not justify the 360 degree of same… When they are away….we feel the best of them which was not sharp…any one to have both of the world’s is brilliant… For Rangan, me and Kala it is a great loss… We cherish day in and out… She has become a Prayer in us…” “Mattru devo bhava”🍁🙏🍁MK is IMMORTAL….

While writting on MK, one should not leave out members who are strong supporters to her throughout….

Her best pal is kannamma, Shantha…well one can see such a relationship, a relationship with no expectations….purity flows in such a spell…her brother Rangan holds the flag also…lot off affection…

Next her servant maid by name Pitchmani, who stood by her in managing the house…very innocent you can see this only in this segment…

Coming to relation….sabita, Ravi and Sridhar…they played a role…which just can not be explained… all three are so respectful and affectionate… Just the best of the world…joined them no less is Mangala… In her late period Mk was supported a lot by Mangala…boon from unexpected circle….

Coming to PatttuSri family Ranga Rajaan was always there to accompany her in most of the travels… Mk can not get better than him in assisting her… Sampath played a good physio doctor role … With touch of a brother, when she had to recover after her treatments… booster for recovery…

MK’s favorite was always Malathi and Bhooma… She was always her guardian…moral support…rare on this earth now…

Well one can not miss Kala, Kala remained always a trusted secretary ….both the relation and bindings just are wonders…

Well I don’t fit into any of above facts…MK was always attached very close to me…the vibration I always use to sense … the challenges of life most of the time blinds or pushes away from responding…

I take this opportunity to thank all the above members immensely and from bottom of my heart wish them the best in life always… Keep up…life is good in these lines…” He concludes.

She would constantly ponder about all her siblings. She would always think ahead, anticipate scenarios, and call them — to prepare them about a trip that they are about to make or a function they are attending, about their health or sometimes a very mundane routine — she would have very clear instructions on what they should and what they should not do. One can only imagine the kind of affection that laid beneath all this. One can also imagine the nature of these conversations — her siblings would be preparing themselves based on their plans and a lot of it would be turned on its head with her call. They would be caught between a natural irritation of changing plans and a sense of respect on how she would always get it right.

In times where its a struggle to get by one’s life, it is inspiring to come across personalities who not only lead a life of perfection but also enrich the lives of families around them with their affection and fore-thought alike. To be among the people who experienced the magic firsthand is indeed a blessing.

To be continued…